I had only had one c-section so I was a candidate for a vbac so I talked to my doctor about whether I would be able to try that. I had really done my research and believed I should be able to at least try and after my doctor gave me 30 million reasons not to have a vbac she allowed me to sign consent forms so that if I went into labor before my scheduled c-section I could try to do it naturally.
The last days...
The last week or so that I was actually pregnant I was sort of crazy. I wanted SO badly to have our baby when he was ready, to go into labor on my own but I saw each day go by with no indication that I would go into labor and my c-section coming closer and closer. At my last doctor appointment before my c-section my doctor assured me that the baby would 'stay put' until we saw each other again on the 28th for his birthday. I wanted to hurt her! She completely squashed all of my hopes for a natural birth but I knew she was probably right...the only person I thought I could compare my pregnancy with was my mom's and she went overdue with all 3 kids.
Merry Christmas...
The evening of December 25th I went to bed early...I'd been having trouble sleeping and I knew once the baby was born I'd regret it if I didn't at least try to get some sleep. Anyways, I went to bed around 9pm and soon after I started having contractions. Of course I had had contractions before so I tried not to think anything of it...I knew that if I really was in labor...I'd eventually know it. Well...I did not get one bit of sleep that night. The contractions were different-in that they were just painful enough to keep me awake and close enough together that I wasn't able to fall asleep between them. So I alternated between trying to sleep, going downstairs and bouncing on the yoga ball...and eating. Dusty got up for work at 4am and I told him to keep his phone on in case I needed to go to the hospital...but I hesitated even saying that because I didn't want to spark any false hope...in him...or me.
At about 8am on the 26th I think the contractions finally stopped. I was SO disappointed. Only 2 days left for the little guy to come into this world on his own.
December 26th...
So I spent some time that day trying to figure out what had happened the night before via (evil) Google...and decided I was just having pre labor and it was normal for that to happen for days or weeks before labor actually started. Depressing! Anyways I again went to bed early and began having contractions. Basically I had a repeat of the night before.
December 27th...
Dusty got up for work again at 4am and I was in tears...I definitely chalked it up to being up 2 nights in a row and thought I was just emotional...but I was REALLY emotional. I told him I thought I needed to go in...I needed to know what was going on. Well, Dusty doesn't get ANY days off work for anything so its kind of bad if he calls in...so he really didn't want to call in...poor guy...I pretty much threw a fit and he ended up staying home. We decided to call my doctor's office when it opened at 8:30 to see what I should do.
I called and the nurse told me to go to labor and delivery at the hospital...so that's what we did.
When we got there I was 1-2cm and 90% effaced which completely surprised me because I didn't really think my body would do it...and didn't believe I was in enough pain for all that to happen. I walked for about an hour and when I was checked again I was at 2-3cm and 100% effaced. So they decided to check me in. I got set up in a room and was convinced by the anesthesiologist to get an epidural because if my old scar tore the pain would about kill me and if they decided I needed a c-section the epidural would already be in place.
Well, my water was broken (by a midwife) and I was walking back to the bed from the bathroom when I was hit by a contraction and couldn't walk anymore....and I started crying...I don't think so much from the pain (it did hurt) but because of how out of control of my body I felt...and I was embarrassed in front of my husband and the nurse for not being able to move during my contraction (I felt like a baby). Anyways, at that point I was 5 cm and ended up getting the epidural then.
Epidurals are so nice and helpful but actually getting them really sucks (especially when you've seen them on youtube and you know the nurse is trying to distract you with the weather so you don't think about the giant needle going into your back).
I labored for a while but the baby was not tolerating the contractions and his heart rate was dropping with each of them...and it dropped VERY VERY low each time...it was terrifying. My doctor said it was like the baby was drowning every time I contracted. They started prepping for the c-section...although they didn't tell me I was going to have a c-section...they kept the c-section hypothetical until the last possible second because they knew I had my heart set on a vbac.
So an emergency c-section is about the most terrifying thing ever. Everybody basically RUNS around to prep everything and get everybody there...I was SO scared because I think just feeling like you're in an episode of ER is terrifying. I basically turned my brain off at that point because I was SO SO close to bawling and when I did that at Micah's c-section I almost hyperventilated b/c it plugged my nose and I couldn't breathe.
Josiah James (who was nameless for 2 days) was born sometime December 27th between 5-6 (too lazy to look). He was 7lbs 5oz...a whole pound more than Micah, and 21 inches long. And let me tell you...there is nothing better than seeing/hearing your healthy baby for the first time!
I had been worried about the c-section being painful because Micah's was...but this time it was so much better. My doctor told me that she could see my uterus contracting during my c-section and it was only contracting in one section...which was around Josiah's neck which was also wrapped in the cord. The ligaments around my uterus had also lost all elasticity...so when I contracted the contractions were not effective to move Josiah down or around into a good position and was basically strangling him. I could have never birthed him on my own. When I was all put back together a couple of nurses were playing with my anomaly of a uterus...pushing it back and forth admiring the crappyness of my ligaments...and pointing and showing other people...including my husband. One nurse told me that I had no business trying for a vbac and should never try again...I have no desire to...should we have more kids.
My mom and brothers arrived from Iowa a little after the c-section...and were able to watch Josiah's first bath while I was in recovery. Later, in my room, with my family, my mother-in-law, Micah, Dusty and our new baby I was just SO happy. It was the best!
I acted differently during my hospital stay this time around. Knowing how important sleep was I just sent Josiah to the nursery during the night and allowed them to feed him bottles. I also always fed him bottles when visitors were there just because that was easier. I wasn't nearly as worried about breastfeeding and bonding and it was so much less stressful being able to allow myself a break while I was there. Definitely more laid back this time around.
Older brother Tyler, younger brother Matthew, Me and Josiah, Dusty, mom and Micah and mom's husband John
...the result of a crappy uterus...a baby with a bruised face.
Love this sweet little guy!!!
My recovery from the c-section was a little harder this time (usually it is easier the second time). I over did it because I am stubborn about accepting help...but altogether it wasn't bad. It took longer for my belly to go down but I was at my pre-pregnancy weight in a week.
The transition to having another child was much better than I expected. Josiah is a wonderful baby...generally easy compared to when Micah was little. Micah is a challenge for me because he can be jealous and has a hard time communicating anyways...which can sometimes lead to misbehaving but as a parent...I am learning...trying to help him through it.
Ok...well I do believe I have written a long enough book for now...
